Tuesday, January 2, 2007

A Magical Tribute To Joseph Smith, Thanks To South Park And Joe's Famous "Head In The Hat Trick" Method Of "Translating" The Book Of Mormon!!



Hey everyone; here is a video I created, the week before Christmas and I just wanted to share it with you, along with my comments. I thought we could all use a good laugh, with so many other serious issues on the table. Enjoy Everyone!!



Here are my comments:

This is a magical tribute to Joseph Smith, the founder and so called "Prophet" of the Mormon church.

With Smithmas(for the Smithians), I mean Christmas, just around the corner, I was feeling very charitable; so I created this tribute with the help of "South Park" and the group "Tag Team", along with a very strong emphasis on Joseph Smith's ridiculous "head in the hat" trick, which he used exclusively to "translate"(fabricate) The Book of Mormon.

Anyone ever see the picture, sold at Jesus' Deseret bookstore, with Joseph Smith sitting at a table, looking at the plates and translating them? I covered this here on my blog in 2005. It's complete bullshit!! I had the damn picture hanging on my wall for 2 years during my mission. Doh!!

Enjoy everyone and forward it on to someone else!! The more people that learn this is how he really translated The Book of Mormon, the merrier.

Here are some descriptions below, that prove how he did it and why it was impossible for him to have made the countless mistakes and errors, including numerous spelling errors and confusion on who god was, which are well documented and near 4,000 in total.

Current Mormon Apostle Russell M. Nelson, in His Talk "A Treasured Testament", given June 25, 1992, at a seminar for new mission presidents, Missionary Training Center, Provo, Utah, said the following:

The details of this miraculous method of translation are still not fully known. Yet we do have a few precious insights. David Whitmer wrote:

"Joseph Smith would put the seer stone into a hat, and put his face in the hat, drawing it closely around his face to exclude the light; and in the darkness the spiritual light would shine. A piece of something resembling parchment would appear, and on that appeared the writing. One character at a time would appear, and under it was the interpretation in English. Brother Joseph would read off the English to Oliver Cowdery, who was his principal scribe, and when it was written down and repeated to Brother Joseph to see if it was correct, then it would disappear, and another character with the interpretation would appear. Thus the Book of Mormon was translated by the gift and power of God, and not by any power of man." (David Whitmer, An Address to All Believers in Christ, Richmond, Mo.: n.p., 1887, p. 12.)

Emma Smith, who acted as an earlier scribe for Joseph, gave this account in 1856:
"When my husband was translating the Book of Mormon, I wrote a part of it, as he dictated each sentence, word for word, and when he came to proper names he could not pronounce, or long words, he spelled them out, and while I was writing them, if I made any mistake in spelling, he would stop me and correct my spelling although it was impossible for him to see how I was writing them down at the time. Even the word Sarah he could not pronounce at first, but had to spell it, and I would pronounce it for him.

"When he stopped for any purpose at any time he would, when he commenced again, begin where he left off without any hesitation, and one time while he was translating he stopped suddenly, pale as a sheet, and said, 'Emma, did Jerusalem have walls around it?' When I answered, 'Yes,' he replied, 'Oh! [I didn't know.] I was afraid I had been deceived.' He had such a limited knowledge of history at that time that he did not even know that Jerusalem was surrounded by walls." (Edmund C. Briggs, "A Visit to Nauvoo in 1856," Journal of History, Jan. 1916, p. 454.)

On another occasion, Emma Smith recorded:

"The plates often lay on the table without any attempt at concealment, wrapped in a small linen tablecloth, which I had given him to fold them in. I once felt of the plates as they thus lay on the table, tracing their outline and shape. They seemed to be pliable like thick paper, and would rustle with a metallic sound when the edges were moved by the thumb, as one does sometimes thumb the edges of a book." ("Last Testimony of Sister Emma," Saints' Herald, 1 Oct. 1879, p. 290; spelling modernized.)

So, "the plates often lay on the table without any attempt at concealment, wrapped in a small linen tablecloth." So were they "wrapped and concealed by a tablecloth" or "not concealed at all?" That sentence completely contradicts itself, but hey, that's Mormonism for you; one contradiction after another!!

Can you dig it fool? Whoomp there it is...LOL!!


Samuel the Utahnite

15 comments:

Alan Watts said...

Hey Samuel,
in the future, don't be too harsh with Eric Hoffman. Being an ex-junkie, he simply lacks a sense of reality sometimes like he did when he was on drugs.
Now he is on a new kind of drug, the "evangelical Jesus loves you!"-drug.
And as no junkie wants you to take away from his drugs, so Eric doesn't want you to take a damn thing from his Jesus-drug.
Peace and love for all,
Alan.

Btw, did you read the poem someone posted on Eric's blog? It was a limerick about Chuck Smith. That was soo funny!

Gunner said...

You stop doing podcasts?

Anonymous said...

I Don't Have a Testimony of the History of the Church I just saw your blog. This is a good article.

Anonymous said...

Hey Samuel,
you going to do podcasts again? I sure miss them. I hope that you will!!

I loved this video of the head in the hat. I wonder why they don't sell that picture at the lard's bookstore.

I know it would sure provoke a lot of discussion if the head in the hat were for sale at Deseret Bookstore.

RfM sucks bad, Mike and Hyrum aren't doing podcasts, you stopped. Man it really stinks to try to find something good. Even mormondiscussions is shitty.

PLEASE think about doing podcasts again!!

Anonymous said...

Please consider more Podcasts , the only one doingthem now is Eric H. You understand the rage, missed your blog and podcasts.

Jason said...

Hey, anonymous,
maybe repeating that same rage over and over again is not so therapeutic at all.
Just move on. Accept the fraud for what it is, but move on. Putting salt in your wounds doesn't help you, nor anyone.
Therefore, the endless repitition of the same material (the sad case about the sister missionaries was covered already, no need to repeat that over and over!) is not helpful for anyone.
Maybe look for other leisure activities, not related to Mormonism and how it traps people.
Enjoy the hobbies you have, and live a life.
I mean seriously, if you only spend your time on mormon discussions and listening to 5 or 6 Ex-mormon podcast, where is the time for the rest of your life.
Maybe Samuel, Hyrum etc. do a good thing in spending less time to produce their rant but live a normal and fruitful life instead.
If sects suck your life away, the best protest is to live a life, a life of freedom, a life without nonsense obligations (wearing special underwear, not drinking coke, etc).

Freedom is what we want, so let's take the freedom and not live a life of forced Anti-Mormonism, not doing anything besides ranting and cursing.

Just my few cents on the topic.
Hey, what am I doing here. I should stop going to this forum *lol*.

Got the point?
Thanks.
Jason.

Elder Joseph said...

Keep up The good work Samuel ... Alot of people need and appreciate you and your help in involvement in Mormonism . Tonight I unintentionally spoke about the Blacks issue to a recent convert of about 18 months . He's black skinned , a sincere person . He was crushed by the news , I felt so bad , I then was steering him towards Darron Smith and also The LDS genesis group support for blacks . This church needs to sort itself out over the issue instead of hoping no one notices the history . Just as bad was when I showed Polygamy in D&C 132 , he was shocked !!

I felt awful showing him , but he thanked me for showing him , he said I did the right thing .Tonight I will pray that God heals his wounds .

Funny enough , I suggested to him not to panic , but keep coming to church and maybe someone can reconcile these things to him ??

I didn't feel good about it . But I was being Honest and thats what is important I reckon. I personally don't know what to make of it all .At least let everyone decide for themselves once they know the full facts .

Elder Joseph

Samuel the Utahnite said...

Just in case Eric does venture in here and once again tries to publicly deny that "he condemned all Mormons to lose their souls forever", here is the audio, for all to here, that cannot be denied:

Eric clearly condemning ALL MORMONS!!

Trust me everyone, I'm not going to re-hash Eric Hoffman, as it isn't worth my time or yours, but I did want to leave the links to the posts that I've written about him previously, for those that are interested, that aren't familiar with the situation or that may be new to Mormon Truth.

They are my answer to his recent trashing of me once again, when I haven't said a damn word about the guy in about 6-7 months or so and I've made it clear that I want nothing to do with him. I don't have time to waste dissecting his deluded head anymore and even if I did have the time, I wouldn't waste it on him. The 10 minutes writing this comment is all I can stomach.

My suggestion is don't waste your time on the guy or the posts I've linked to, because he can't even remember what he says, then lies about it, either publicly or privately, changes his story and really isn't worth it, as many of us here already know.

And Eric says that I was obsessed with him and that I was like a stalker, and scaring him, etc? WTF? 6-7 months later and he's still taking shots at me, talking about me and lying, like we were never friends and he has always hated my blogs?

I just hate liars(especially the "saved" ones-LOL) and felt the need to clear up any misconceptions that his latest lies may have caused some of you. And this is the guy who claims to be "taking the high road" and gets congratulated for doing it, by his Calvary preacher buddy TheoJoe? What a joke!! Eric your arrogance about yourself being saved and all of us burning in the flames of hell is palpable and sickening!!

Here are the links if interested:

Are Die-hard Christian Zealots Or Apologists Worse Than Their Counterparts In Mormonism? Hell Yeah They Are!!

Fanaticism, Blanket Condemnation And A Saint Called Eric Hoffman!! Eric Says, "As long as you believe Joseph Smith...you will lose your soul forever!!

My Review Of The New "OxyMormonic Podcast". All I Can Say, Is That I Hope It Gets Better For All the Listeners.

Whatever happened to that OxyMormonic podcast anyway? It died after 2 shows and my review? Yep, it did!!

Here is a link to Chuck Smith, the founder and CEO of Eric's Calvary Church/Network he belongs to, on a radio show, lying about having predicted when Christ would return, which he clearly did in his books more than once. I like the very end though, as it's pretty damn funny and I don't think he was joking. Do you guys?

Take care everyone and once again Eric, MOVE ON DUDE and quit reading my blog and comments and lying about how it offends you, and then talking more shit about me, okay? If you were truly so offended and repulsed, YOU WOULDN'T BE HERE DUDE!!

Then again, maybe by continuing to read my blogs daily, as you do and listening to my future podcasts, as you will; you might actually learn something about Mormonism and have compassion for us ex-Mormons, instead of condemning us to "lose our souls forever" and "burn in the flames of hell for all eternity", while "gnashing our teeth." One can always hope, right?

Now, shut the hell up about me and so that I don't have to respond to your idiocy anymore, okay?

Samuel

Gunner said...

I'm getting an error on the link to the interviews. iTunes will not take it. Do you have a direct RSS link?

Samuel the Utahnite said...

Sorry about that Gunner and everyone else!! That was the only link I didn't double check when I posted that comment. Let's try it again and this time I'll make sure it works:

Mormon Truth Interviews

Samuel

Anonymous said...

Im not sure what happened to decieve you so much, but what makes you so sure you're not entirely wrong?

Samuel the Utahnite said...

I wasn't deceived and I know this with a surety, because facts are facts, truth is truth and reality is reality. I'm no longer living in the delusional fantasyland of Mormon bosoms burning everywhere, as absolute proof that "the church is true, Joseph Smith was a Prophet", etc. I've graduated into the "real world" now and it's great!!

Anyone that has a functioning brain, that can differentiate right and wrong, fact and fiction and can use a little logic instead of pure emotion and burning bosoms, will be able to find the truth.

If anyone does this, they will easily know that Mormonism is a complete fraud based on many countless lies and deceptions, all the way back to the First Vision, that never even happened.

At first, it will be extremely difficult psychologically and emotionally to accept and the pain is tremendous, to discover that you've been deceived your whole entire life. Then, that pain gives way to the amazing feeling of freedom you have, which for me, was mainly freedom of thought and expression.

For the first time in my life, I was able to expand my mind and without fear, do some very deep thinking, that wasn't based on the parameters of Mormonism as my boundaries and limitations.

I finally realized that I didn't have all the answers as I once arrogantly assumed as a life-long Mormon, especially as a cocky 19 year old missionary, who knew everything about life, the church, God, etc. Yeah, that MTC does a real number on the young people with their indoctrination/role playing tactics.

When Hinckley brought this issue up in General Conference, about all the different versions of the First Vision and how the critics use these facts to attack the church, he said: SO WHAT?!! Is that really the type of response and insight you expect from a so called Prophet of God? It's easy to say "so what", when he already knows it's a complete fraud anyway and he knew that he'd get a good laugh from the Morgbots.

Hopefully you Anon, aren't one of the those sheeple in the audience, that would have the Mormon laughter as they did that day, at that remark. Instead, go investigate it, as I have and many others have and you'll be shocked at your findings.

Read the comments that Ray left in the last post regarding the First Vision and who was in it, how it kept changing and evolving, etc. Also, I highly suggest Grant Palmer's book: "An Insider's View Of Mormon Origins." Just in case you're afraid to buy it, because it isn't in the "official, approved church curriculum", it is for sale at Jesus' beloved University bookstore in Provo Utah. However, you may want to contact your Bishop, just to make sure you won't be disfellowshipped or excommunicated for buying it and reading it. LOL!!

It's an awesome book(that the church sells for some reason), because it completely debunks the entire foundation of Mormonism, right to the core. Too bad they still sell a book that caused a man to be disfellowshipped, right? It's good enough to profit from, but far too damaging for Grant Palmer to keep his church membership? Explain that one and oh yeah, why it was sold in Deseret bookstore for 2 years before his "court of love."

I wonder if they've ever called a "court of love" for all of those that agreed to sell his book in the first place, like Hinckley's little favorite gal and Deseret book CEO, Sheri Dew? Yeah right!!

Well, good luck in your journey Anon and we'll be here waiting to help you if you have any further questions or need our assistance.

Samuel

Gunner said...

Worked. Thanks Samuel.

The carnival is this week if you want to submit anything.

Galatian said...

Samuel - I missed this article and just read it today and watched your "remix" video. OMFG I was laughing so hard I just about pissed myself! I just read all the comments too. I know you hear this a lot, and it's overdue on my part - but THANK YOU. Some don't, but most of us DO understand why you're doing this, and we feel the exact same way! You're doing an incredible job and helping so many ppl, and those of us with loved-ones in the cult thank you. Somewhere out there, you are helping others (if not our own family/friends who are still in denial) escape the cult and others' loved ones are being helped!! Thank you so much for all you do, and AWESOME VIDEO! (LOL)

farmgirl said...

I was wondering, if the mormon church is a hoax, how do they continue to increase their numbers, and other churches are loosing their members? I just think if it is a hoax, how can you fool hundreds of thousands of people, it just seems that when you teach false doctrine, you never really progress, but this church has. Any ideas why?